Wine

 

Wine-Club

 

Most people don’t know how to drink wine. The next time you go out with friends/family, just watch them take their first sip. If it appears that they’ve just swallowed it, they’ve done it wrong (not to mention, they’ve wasted the wine). THIS is how you drink wine:

 

  1. Take in a moderate amount of wine.
  2. Swish the wine like it was mouth wash, but focus on hitting all parts of your tongue.
  3. After your tongue is fully drenched, swallow. (It will be bitter, as it should be, not ” oh this wine is good”, bullshit.)
  4. Now drink it as you normally would.
  5. Orgasm.

 

If you have a bottle lying around, try it. If you want style points, swirl the wine (aerate) then dig your nose in the glass and take in a huge whiff before taking your first sip. The second sip is the true introduction, and it will taste nothing like the first.

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About Vincent Matthews